What To Do When Your Child Gets Their Bad Behavior From You

  • It’s inevitable. Your child will do something that makes you mad or sad…and you’ll realize they got that behavior from you…the need to always be right, procrastination, gossip, a temper, sarcasm, messiness, not listening well, being a rule-breaker, etc.
  • Don’t make excuses for or ignore their behavior that comes from you.
  • And don’t be a hypocrite creating negative consequences for your kid’s behavior while you do the same thing.
  • How do you respond when your child messes up and they’re just repeating your behavior?
    • Be open with them. Let them know that they got that behavior from you (via genetics or copying.) But that does not make it okay.
    • When your child does something that is not good, there should be negative consequences because of that behavior. Even if they got it from you.
    • If you still do this behavior, stop! Let them see you changing and improving.
    • Share with them how that behavior has hurt you and others in the past.
    • Only if this is true…tell them how you’ve worked on changing or stopping that behavior. Tell them about the positive consequences you’ve experienced.

You Are Controlling Your Child And It’s Hurting You Both

  • We all control our kid’s life to some degree…some of us do it on purpose and some of us are not even aware.
  • Let’s be selfish. Controlling their life takes a lot of physical and emotional energy out of you. Energy you should be using elsewhere. Here’s a post about that.
  • When you control your kid, you are…
    • making them lazy.
    • making them unprepared for their next phase…preschool, school age, tween years, adolescence, college, adulthood.
    • turning them into an adult who won’t be able to adult.
  • How can you control your child less?
    • Let them do difficult things.
    • Let them fail.
    • Let them experience consequences.
    • Let them feel uncomfortable.
    • Let them solve their own problems.
    • Let them experience bad things.
  • You can do it! You can still be there for them. Show them guidance and love instead of control.

Three Ways To Help Your Introverted Child

  • If your child is an introvert, it does not mean they are shy. It does not mean they do not enjoy people. It just means they need some time alone to re-energize and feel “right.”
  • How can you set up your introvert for success?
    1. Give them time alone. Time by themselves. That means you need to leave them alone.
    2. Let them do what they want to do during their alone time. Things like playing and reading give them what they need to re-energize. Extended periods of time in front of a screen probably do not re-energize them…even though they will say it does.
    3. Give them time alone when they need time alone. Introverts will know when they need time alone. Don’t force alone time on them.

Make Spring Break Great Again

  • Remember in high school and college when Spring Break was the best week of the year?!
  • You’re a dad now. And Spring Break is not what it used to be. But you can make Spring Break great again!
  • Take a day or two or three off. Unplug from work. Let your child know that you’re not working because they’re not in school.
  • Plan fun. Do something fun…at home, away from home, who cares. Just do something that makes everyone smile and laugh.
  • Go outside. Do something outside. It’s Spring!
  • Do something that is fun for you. It’s okay to do it alone.